Friday, 9 September 2016


Yaay!! My first personal post of 2016 – Yes, I usually don’t write about myself.  

Two weeks ago, I realized I graduated 6 years ago. 6years of absolute change and transformation. When I was leaving University and relocating back home - I had only two goals – two goals I am yet to achieve.  Looking back at the goals, I feel if I had achieved them, I wouldn’t be the better version of myself today; hence, I am very thankful

My life has taught me not to judge people by their “yesterday” and to give them the benefit of a doubt even if they hurt* you because if anyone had judged me by my very subtle past, the person is probably reading the 5th  edition of a book that now has a 15th edition.

I remember reading a pre-wedding story on Bellanaija where the husband stated is fiancée used to be a party hopper and he was not that kind of guy so they went separate ways. Years later when he met her, she was a transformed lady and they are getting married. What if he never gave her a second chance?

I also remember the story about a guy who used to have sugar mummies in University and did not know whether or not to mention his past to his bride to be. Four years after marriage with a second baby on the way, his wife still thanks my friend for introducing them. The peace of mind and love in her home cannot be compared with any of the relationship she has experienced including her parents own – who are your regular upright prayer point couple.

To be honest, I can go on and on about stories on how people have changed and how second chance should be given.

I saw this quote on my friend’s profile –“When someone treats you like an option, help them narrow their choices by removing yourself from the equation” I remember replying “When you have the opportunity, treat them way better but try as much as possible not to be available to them again” – (maybe I should let go of the “again”, if they come back willingly – give them a second chance, if they mess up again – then let go)

Till next time, remember age does not equal maturity, when life happens, we are forced to grow up faster than others. You might have met someone in their immature stage, they probably have grown up now – give them a second chance.          
*Hurt: excludes hurt in an abusive manner. Please, if someone is abusing you – physically, sexually, emotionally – get yourself to a safe haven then get counselling.

Lẹẹkansi is a Yoruba word that means “again", "try again", "one more time" and maybe "Second chance”

Post was edited by AOB 


  1. The truth is that you need God's direction to make the choice on whether to walk away or keep being nice to them. Some people take you as a Maga and use you as a perfect opportunity strategy.Trust me, this is very painful. Some people will never change.There is a big difference in not doing something good and doing something bad.I just believe you should always follow your intuition and try to be honest in your doings. So at the end, I pray for God to give us the serenity to accept things we cannot change, the courage to change the things we can and the wisdom to know the difference(this is key).

  2. God bless you for this sweetie...... Leekansi

  3. Well said. I usually don't judge people by their past until they prove they haven't changed. From experience, the changes that stick with people are actually self thought changes not the one imposed on them by others.

  4. Very nice and insightful post . we as humans need to realise that fellow human are fallible and can err .so we need to give others a 5th chance sometimes . also we should realise that people can change their habits but can rarely change their personality . a girlfriend beater will always be a wife basher. An hot tempered person will always be fiery .

  5. You just hit the nail right Billy, Truly age ain't maturity and we all deserve second chances.

  6. Good one!More of this Leekansii